We all do it. There are times all through the week that yes, you’ve got your judgy pants on. I do it, there is no point acting or saying that we don’t. Lately, it seems that the trend is to write about all these people and judge and comment and gasp at the horribly outrageous things that other mums do, other parents do or just other people do. But let’s face it. We all do it, just some of us choose to vent it all over social media and other people keep it to themselves.
We all get our judgy pants on from time to time because it makes us feel better about our mistakes and our own lives. It makes us sometimes feel good that someone else is failing at something instead of us. We have all scoffed at what someone else has been wearing, or the colour of someone’s hair, their weight. We have judged the mother snapping at her child, or for not snapping at their child or the contents of their shopping trolley. We judge people on their looks. And anyone who can tell me they haven’t judged someone’s driving or parallel parking is just plain lying!
Now a lot of people are getting angry at the judgy people because it’s not right to judge others when we don’t know their circumstances, and this is true. There have been many stories on the news lately of dangerous situations that children have been put in with terrible outcomes. But what if to some degree the judgy pant brigade was a good thing? Now before you get your judgy pants on with me, please bear with me. The reason why I say this is that often, it does actually get the community talking. Perhaps instead of the judgy people completely removing their judgy pants altogether we could just have discussions to both support the person we are talking about and perhaps ways to do it differently next time.
Judgy pant people get the community discussing issues or situations that perhaps do need talking about. It opens people up for discussion, sometimes when I discuss things with people particularly things that we have seen lately on social media, it opens me up to other people’s opinions and ideas. Often because of this discussion I have ended up learning something new – sometimes good and sometimes bad but it got me thinking and that’s a good thing. I had my own opinion on the matter and then I found out someone else’s and I learnt and grew from this discussion.
Now in saying all this, I do reiterate I am not saying you throw your pants off and have a swing at people, post it on social media and really lash out at how bad this person was. That is why they get a bad rap as they should, and let’s face it no one is perfect. We all make mistakes so I don’t really understand why the judgy brigade are quite so judgy when I am sure there is dirt to be found on them too, or maybe their friends are just too nice to plaster it all over Facebook.
Perhaps we can all learn how to judge people better. To think more about how and why we judge people. There is always going to be those people out there and they are always going to judge, it’s what we as humans do. But instead of projecting our judginess we can think about how we would handle the situation. Discuss the issue for sure. Talk to your friends because this will often open your eyes to views and thoughts you had never thought about. We can all learn something from another person and another situation.
We are all here to learn.
Let’s flip it back on the judgy people and use it to everyone’s advantage, not for judging how someone was but opening up the discussion to be constructive and improve the way we are. Or just accept that things happen and no one is perfect and discuss that.
So are you prepared to use your judgy pants for the good?